Eternity

It's 12:42 am.

Breathe in. Breathe out. Tonight I am restless, overtaken by an all-consuming and unknown fervor. As I sit here on my bed, my back against the wall and my computer on my lap, I am struck by contemplation. God. Love. Eternity. Saving grace. Mercy beyond compare. What are these things? My mind races, trying to fill in the gaps left by my humanity. Why me, God? Why me? What love is this, I'm so unworthy to be called one of your own! My thoughts are sporadic, unconnected, distant. God glue me together! I'm a broken vessel, my mind a wandering and thirsty nomad in the desert. I need you, Father, I need you. You. Not him. Not her. Not me. You. No one but you. Touch my heart with your inspiration. Breathe in. Breathe out. Your breath, Lord, your breath. Your breath is what causes me to live. To live. TO LIVE! Lord who am I to be a living demonstration of your glory and power?
The house is quiet. My spirit—anything but still. When a mind is screaming, a quiet house is a thunderous hell. There is nothing to draw one's attention from the clamor of unsaid thoughts…

"From eternity to eternity I am God.
No one can snatch anyone out of my hand.
No one can undo what I have done." Isaiah 43:13

God speaks, the heart listens.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
The noise lessens. My breathing deepens.
There is nothing to fear. Trust in the Arms wrapped around you.
Peace.